Why I'm not Vaccinated

I have three brothers, all living in Norway. We used to get together with my parents every summer for a four day stay somewhere in Europe. We've been all over the place, and it's always been great. However, we had to cancel last year's trip due to the plague, and this year will be a short affair in Norway. We're not going to Malta, as we had originally planned. Besides, I'm not going anywhere anytime soon. I'm not going to submit myself to tests and the possibility that everything gets cancelled at the last minute. I'd rather wait for the plague to pass before visiting my family again. So, when my twin brother asked me if I'm joining them for their planned excursion in Norway, I told him I wouldn't. His immediate reaction was to ask me if I'm vaccinated.

I never signalled anything but suspicion towards the vaccine, so my vaccine status shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone. However, I didn't answer my brother directly. Instead, I pointed out that the vaccine is ineffective against both Delta and Lambda. I also told him that my parents know I'm staying in Portugal until the pandemic is over.

That's all it took to end the conversation. My brother didn't pry any deeper. Why should he? The logical conclusion from what I told him is that I'm either not vaccinated because it's ineffective, or I'm vaccinated but still concerned because it's ineffective. Either way, the message is clear. Anyone that took the vaccine because of its health benefits made a bad decision.

However, if my brother had continued the conversation, I would have pointed out that the vaccine is experimental, and that the full list of side effects will only be known a few years into the future. I'd tell him of the people who get sick for no good reason at all, because their illness cannot be blamed on the vaccine that they recently took. There are more people seriously ill now than during the height of the pandemic a year back. The reporting on the matter seems lopsided and unbalanced at best. It's not news but propaganda.

The killer argument, to be delivered last, is that not being vaccinated makes me sleep soundly at night. This would not be the case if I went ahead with the vaccine. I would toss and turn at night, unable to sleep.

The vaccinated defend their decision to take the vaccine in the same terms, so I can appeal to empathy. If they took the vaccine to sleep soundly, why not let me avoid the vaccine for the same reason? Who are they to take away my sleep at night?

The problem with restless sleep is that it cannot be easily cured, and it can only be partially medicated. The only way to cure restless sleep is to have a clean conscience, and that is only achieved by doing the right thing. Love, faith in nature and hope for the future are the ingredients that make up a good night's sleep. Doing things contrary to our will, out of fear or for want of a privilege such as a vaccine passport, goes against our conscience.

Bad conscience can be suppressed while we're awake, but it cannot be suppressed during our sleep. Once in bed, the topic surfaces, preventing us from sleeping soundly. That's in the end the reason I'm staying away from the vaccine. No reward, however great, can make up for the loss of sleep that comes with a bad conscience.

Once this is explained to our vaccinated friends, they will argue that they too sleep soundly at night, and that it is their decision to be vaccinated that did this. But that's besides the point. If taking the vaccine was what it took to sleep soundly at night, that's good for them. But it wouldn't work for me. My sleep depends on me being unvaccinated.

However, the vaccinated are almost all in denial, so they're unlikely to sleep as soundly at night as do the unvaccinated. They're troubled by their conscience. The last thing they want to hear are good arguments against the vaccine. That's why my twin brother was quick to stop the conversation on the topic. He knows that I have weighty arguments for my position, and he does not want to hear them.

Happy with my vaccine status