To be a king, in the proper archetype sense of the word, a man must not only be the head of a household, with loyal descendants, he must also have control of a domain. This domain is the realm of the king. This is typically his private estate and any associated properties, not necessarily owned by him.
The good king will protect anyone inside his realm. If under attack, the entire realm will be defended by the king. This is often due to purely practical considerations. A majority stake holder in an undertaking cannot easily defend his part without also defending everybody else. However, the good king makes no fuss about this, and the natural reward from the minority stake holders is admiration and loyalty, which in turn makes the defense of the realm all that more easy to perform.
The bad king on the other hand is a despot. He seeks to use his stake as a means to dominate everybody else. He will demand protection money in the form of rent. He will demand admiration, loyalty, and even thanks and praise for his actions. In this respect, every nation but a handful of mini-nations scattered around the globe, is in the hands of despots. The political leaders of nations everywhere demand taxes, praise and thanks while constantly subjecting citizens to harassment in the form of needless regulations and micromanagement.
However, there are lesser kings everywhere. We do not have to sway political power to be king. What is required is a sense of sovereignty. Anyone rejecting the sovereignty of the political establishment is automatically an aristocrat. This was pointed out by Fernando Pessoa a hundred years ago. Add life experience, an estate, loyal descendants and friends to this, and we have a king.
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